The effect of Parental Love...or lack thereof

Three years ago, after a series of tragic events; I was led to pray for children for a year.  It was challenging, exhausting and sometimes hard, but God blessed our obedience.  When I read the post from March 17, 2013, it blessed me all over again with a new revelation.

The post talked about what a parent should do when raising children.  Listed in the post was/is content from a wonderful article on Parents and Children in the Full Life Study Bible that say, "In bringing up their children, parents should show no favoritism, encourage as well as correct, punish only intentional wrongdoing, and dedicate their lives in love to their children with hearts of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience (Colossians 3:12-14)."  As I reflected on this post, I immediately thought; "what if a parent doesn't possess any of that to give"?  I'm referring to the compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience.  Now I'm sure that you're probably saying, 'of course, a parent has that to give to their child, but I'm not talking about your typical parent.  I'm talking about your not-so-good parent.  The drug-addicted parent; The work-a-holic parent; The absent-because-I-missed-my-childhood-parent; The I-never-got-over-the-relationship-so-I'm-going-to-punish-you parent...any of these sound familiar?  Can you see how easy it would be for one of these ill-equipped parents to not have anything to give to their children?  Hence, the challenge we have with so many of our children and youth.  All you have to do is stand outside watching a group of young people playing basketball and there's bound to be cussing or fighting.  Those young people probably didn't receive a lot of kindness or patience.  As I go about my day in the school where I work; I see the children who have not received parental compassion, so it's no wonder they have none to give.  And let us not forget that the lack of kindness and gentleness undoubtedly breeds bullies to keep the cycle going.

We have to pray for those parents that are not equipped, for whatever reason, to raise and love their children.  When a child/young person doesn't receive the parental love that he/she needs, they end up being hurt people--who hurt, people...most likely your child or my child.

Dear Lord, we acknowledge that there are some parents who may not win 'Parent of the Year', but that's why we have You as the ultimate example.  We believe that even now, You can still renew and redeem those parents...show us how to love them and pray for them.  Thank you for Your grace and mercy that says every child, no matter who their parents are, has greatness inside of them.  Help us to see that greatness, pray for that greatness and cultivate that greatness.  In Jesus name, Amen!

My Flower

You're my flower.  I have tenderly watched over you since you were a tiny seed.  I've watered and nourished you.  I've been there through each day of your life, caring for you, providing your needs, and helping you through difficult times when the ground was dry or the sun was hot or those passing by stepped on your delicate petals and leaves.

I love the color of your petals and how they sparkle and shine when the dew of My love settles on them.  It makes My heart glad when you open your blossom to absorb the sunshine of My love and the warmth of My Spirit.  Keep soaking up the water of My Word so your leaves will stay green and healthy.  Keep opening up to the light and warmth of My sunshine, and keep absorbing My rays so your colors and fragrance can cheer others.

If fills Me with joy when I see you giving off that sweet fragrance that makes others happy, encouraging them and lifting their spirits.  You have so much to give, My little flower.

From Jesus with Love for Women

My favorite flower is the Lily.  I had them in my wedding bouquet, I love to receive them, I think they're beautiful and love the fact that there are several kinds of lilies.  They come in different shapes, sizes and colors.  "The Lily flower symbolizes purity and refined beauty.  Based on the color or type, the Lily flower can convey different meanings" (theflowerexpert.com).

When I read these words...calling me His flower, initially I didn't get it.  But then I searched for information about my favorite flower and it hit me.  HE CARES FOR ME!!!  If you think about the time, patience, love and effort it takes to grow flowers, you already know.  Not only do you have to make sure the flower has the proper nourishment; you have to protect the flower, you have to remove any weeds from around the flower, you even have to occasionally move the flower to ensure it has the proper climate to thrive.  SPEAK LORD!!!

Heavenly Father, thank you for calling me Your flower!  I see that You delight in me and have taken time to fuss over me so that I grow and produce and bring joy to those around me.  You have covered me and made sure that what I thought would kill me...DID NOT!  "When the wicked, even mine enemies and my foes, came upon me to eat up my flesh, they stumbled and fell."  I've lost a few friends/weeds along the way in the pruning and purging process.  When I thought I knew better, You blocked it for what was best.  I am Your flower and I thank you for helping me see the bloom.  I lift my praise to You...let it be a sweet aroma to You.  Amen!  

My special love for you

I love you, My darling!  I loved you yesterday, I love you today, and I will love you always.

How do I love you?--I love you unconditionally.  I love you completely.  I love you eternally.  I love you like a father loves his child.  I love you like a husband loves his wife.  I love you tenderly.  I love you passionately.  I love you perfectly.

Why do I love you?--I love you because you are Mine.  I love you because you love Me.  I love you because you are beautiful in My sight.  I love you because you are a part of Me.

When do I love you?--I love you when you're in ecstasy, and I love you when you're in despair.  I love you when you're successful, and I love you when you feel you've failed.  I love you when you do what's right, and I love you even when you make mistakes.  I love you when you feel like giving up, and I love you when you hold on.

How long will I love you?--I will love you always and forever!

From Jesus With Love for Women


What stands out in this message to me, is the contrast of our love to Jesus' love!  For every way, reason and length of time this message uses to convey the Jesus' love for us (women), we have undoubtedly contradicted that love in some way.  Jesus' love for us is not hard to fathom or conceive, but us loving ourselves...well now the rubber is meeting the road.  Women have been deceived into believing that if/when they love themselves; they are being selfish, thoughtless and inconsiderate.

I will be transparent and say that I did not love myself every day this week.  I have not loved myself unconditionally and completely.  Not having my father around has left that void and I'm often suspicious of my husband's love.  I sometimes feel out of place in this world, so belonging to Jesus and loving Jesus should make sense, but recently I have even questioned that.  Jesus sees my beauty...why can't I?!?  He loves me when I'm up and when I'm down; when things are good and when they're bad, whether I'm happy or I'm sad.  So why can't I?

Dear Lord, open the eyes of my heart so that I may see me, the way that you see me.  Help me to love me for me.  Help me to love me in an unapologetic way.  I thank you for loving me and for all of the others in my life that love me.  I need to love myself...really love myself in order to reciprocate that love.  Just as the father said in Mark 9:24 "Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief".  Lord I love You:  help thou my self-love!  Amen.

Praising

March 4, 2014

Today after his session, the speech therapist said that she wanted us to work with Isaac on 'ing' words and getting him to use them correctly in context.  So tonight after his shower, as I was getting him out of the tub; I started jumping up and down.  I prompted him by saying, "what is mommy doing"?  He repeated the question back to me (as he always does) and giving him another prompt, I said, "mommy is..." and left the statement open for him to finish.  His response made me laugh but it also blessed me.  Isaac said "praising". 

I laughed because I was going for and expecting him to say "jumping".  His response blessed me because it allowed me to see that although time is filled with swift transition; when my child sees me, he sees PRAISE! 


God thank you for reminding me that we live and move and have our being because of Your Spirit!  Thank you for reminding me that in ALL THINGS, we should give praise because You are worthy of ALL PRAISE.  We thank you for being a promise keeper and for your faithfulness to us.  I thank you for using my child to remind to praise. 

#Praising

October 20 - Sexual Immorality

Next to catastrophic injury, death, and eternal hell, sexual immorality is the most dreaded possibility for our children's lives.  I know that with sexual sin the fullness of God's presence, peace, blessing, and joy is sacrificed.  The price is way too high.  (Power of a Praying Parent, Stormie Omartian)

Maybe the reason why Ms. Omartian places so much weight on the effects of sexual immorality is because of what is forfeited.  This is not to say that our children are not forgiven and God does not extend grace, NO; they are fortunate that He's the God of a second chance (truth be told, so are we).  Nevertheless, when our children forfeit purity for pleasure; he/she does not get the benefit of the fullness of all that God has ordained and set aside for them. 

Although the most visible result of sexual immorality, pregnancy is not the only consequence of this sin.  To name a few; HIV/AIDS, an array of sexually transmitted diseases, lack of desire, too much desire, emotional numbness and distress and lack of commitment.  These days we even have people in Christian leadership being sexually immoral and trying to justify it (see 'Preachers of LA').

If our children are going to stand a chance in this hyper-sexual society; we may need to incorporate some serious prayer and fasting along with unadulterated teaching of God's word.  We can no longer sit back and not talk about sex (on a REAL level), when every other image they see is trying to elicit an arousal from them...and not just heterosexual arousal (yes, I went there!). 

I am praying right now for the young man who will see my daughter as the jewel that she is and before he asks us for her hand, he seeks the approval of her heavenly father.  I'm thanking God right now that He is preparing suitable wives for my sons and that my sons will love their wives the way Christ loved the church. 

We have to be more proactive in our prayers over the sexual immorality of our children because as Ms. Omartian said, "The price is way too high".

September 25 - STILL HAVE JOY

The joy of the Lord is rich and deep and causes anyone who walks in it to be likewise.  That's because joy doesn't have anything to do with happy circumstances; it has to do with looking into the face of God and knowing He's all we'll ever need.  (The Power of a Praying Parent, Stormie Omartian)

"...joy doesn't have anything to do with happy circumstances"; I KNOW THAT'S RIGHT!!!  I often say that I'll take joy over happiness ANY day because to me; happiness is contingent on things, while joy is in spite of things.  Joy is the fruit of the Spirit and accordingly, dwells within the believer.  Like the illustration that says you don't see the true purpose of a tea bag until it's placed in hot water...the joy within us is refined in the midst of trying times.  Habakkuk 3:18-19 says, "yet I will rejoice in the Lord!  I will be joyful in the God of my salvation!  The Sovereign Lord is my strength! He makes me as surefooted as a deer, able to tread upon the heights."  When we fully grasp that God is all we need; walking in the joy of the Lord is more easily achieved...joy enables us to tread upon the heights.

Thank you Lord for being so good to us and being so kind and being so merciful.  You have given us our place of refuge and we are truly grateful.  Your word says in James 1:2-3, "Dear brothers and sisters, when troubles come your way, consider it an opportunity for great joy.  For you know that when your faith is tested, your endurance has a chance to grow".  As we look into the face of God with joy in our hearts, we say 'This joy I have, the world didn't give it and the world can't take it away'...in Jesus name, Amen!


ENJOY!!!  http://youtu.be/qfJ2LZQbvs4 

September 16

Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.  (1 Timothy 4:12 NIV)

We didn't have to deal with half of the things our children face.  I've heard some people say that they don't know if they could survive some of the darts being thrown at our children.  The enemy plots and schemes using insecurity and instability against them.  HIV/AIDS, homicides, absent parents, drug abuse, perverted lust and runaway social media have tried to take them out,  But thanks be to God who has caused them to triumph IN SPITE OF!!! Witnessing the city wide Youth and Young Adult revival this year, fittingly themed "City On Our Knees"; I watched some of the 'youngins' setting an example for the believers and for that I am encouraged that the scripture in 1 Timothy has taken root.

Thank you Lord for not letting Your word return void!  There is a chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation, God’s special possession, that is declaring the praises of Him who called them out of darkness into His wonderful light.  We pray that You continue to keep our children in the safety of Your arms as they strive to live according to Your will and be examples in this world.  In Jesus name, Amen!